Breaking News Edition
Earlier this week notable Lipscomb University student Steven Kleinshmidt, mechanical engineering major and local celebrity, made national headlines with one clever tweet and now his life may never be the same. The fame that has come from his quick wit has left most people in complete shock. The tweet has been retweeted 70,000 times and liked by 384,000 people. On top of that news articles have been written about Steven by Buzzfeed, Distractify, and many more. Here is the original tweet so you can laugh along with everyone else.
Most people are wondering where will this newfound fame take him? To what heights will he reach next? As the whole world awaits his next gut-busting hilarious tweet I went after the answers to these questions.
In my interview with Mr. Kleinshmidt I asked the hard questions. I truly held nothing back and the answers he gave may surprise you. For example, when asked if he had found any possible future wives in his Twitter mentions Steven said “there is some potential.” Watch out ladies because your man might be off the market sooner than you think. Shout out to the fellas though because when asked about any possible future husbands he said “probably more than potential wives.” I then asked if he had anything to say to those potential male suiters and he replied “wassup.” Your odds are looking good gents.
Steve has a bright future ahead of him as he rides the wave of fame and he seems to think so too. When asked where he sees himself in ten years he told me “married to a girl I met on twitter” but that success won’t last long. Like most sudden celebrities he sees himself falling down a dark path. He says in thirty years he’ll be “dead from a drug overdose.” Well Stevie, if Lindsay Lohan is still kicking it I believe you might just survive at least the next forty years. Have hope and stay strong. We believe in you #StandWithSteve. Perhaps his legacy will outlast him though. His role models are Jesus, Johnny Cash, and Julius Caesar. I see a common trend of tragic death and long-lasting popularity.
Well folks, there you have it. Lipscomb University is finally on the map thanks to our first ever celebrity-student Steven Kleinshmidt.
You may now resume your regularly scheduled summer break.
I can’t wait to see all you lovely readers in the fall.